Funny short relationship jokes that pokes fun at relationships and marriage. Also includes numerous jokes about women and men.

Girlfriend just told me she doesn’t care what she gets for Christmas as long as it has diamonds in it.

A pack of playing cards it is then.

Earlier today my wife asked me to pass her some lip balm but I ended up giving her superglue by mistake. She’s still not talking to me.

Facebook Message

By Don Juan

My girlfriend just sent me a Facebook message saying:

“helpmyspacebarbrokecanyoucomeoverandgivemeanalternative”

Does anybody know what ‘ternative’ means?

The following conversation took place between a wife and husband after a lottery win.

Husband: If I won the lottery what would you do?
Wife: I’d divorce you and take half the money.
Husband: Ok, well I just won $10, here’s $5 now f*ck off!!

I’ve spent the last 3 years looking for my ex-wife’s killer… Still can’t find anyone to do it.

After visiting our house my mother-in-law got ambushed by 6 men who starting punching her. My wife shouted “Are you gonna help?”, I said “6 should be enough!”

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