Finally old enough to date, I awkwardly take my first girlfriend to a fancy restaurant where they don’t have cheeseburgers or pizza on the menu.

Waitress: Soup or Salad?

Me: Sure, super salad sounds good!

Waitress: Sir, soup or salad?

Me: Yep, super salad sounds good.

Waitress, slightly annoyed: Would you like the soup…. or… the salad?

Me, embarrassed and red: I’ll have the salad.